Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Baby Books....and other ways I know I'm failing.

While I was pregnant, I was so excited to get Davis a really great baby book.  As a kid, I remember reading my baby book about 1,000,000 times.  I loved to read all about my firsts, see pictures, and see how much I changed.  I also used it as a reference for my blood type (I still can't remember if I'm O+ or O-...better go check my baby book), my weight at height at birth, who attended my first birthday, and loads of other tidbits of info that you simply can't live without. 

My search for a baby book for Davis was not easy.  Most every one I saw was more of a scrap book and didn't have many spaces to write things.  After scouring Amazon, I found this one....only to later see it at Babies R Us.  I feel like it taunts me every time I walk in.

When he was born, I had it with me at the hospital to be sure to get the foot and hand prints.  This is how that worked out:

Seriously?!?!?  You are going to smudge his baby book prints?  He's a newborn....you can't muster up the strength to hold him still for 2 seconds.  And, you don't do hand prints anymore?  What kind of crap is that? Now, most moms would have done their own hand prints if they really wanted to keep on top of the baby book....but apparently I'm not most moms.  I do have a single hand print that is in a frame in his room which will eventually end up here.  Now Davis will grow up believing he was only born with one hand.  Let the emotional scaring begin.

My work on the baby book started strong:

Then it turned into this:
One day I will glue all of the pictures in.

As I fill out each page, rather than feeling happiness and fulfillment, I am overwhelmed with feelings of failure.  Examples:

1.  I didn't take a picture of his first bath.  How am I allowed to keep my child?  What mother doesn't take pictures of her child's first bath????  I mean, it was an emergency bath because there was poop all the way up his back and so all hands were on deck, but still, I should have remembered the camera!

2.  I don't remember his first outing.  I know it was very early on because I refused to stay cooped up in the house, but I honestly don't remember it.  So....I made it up.

3.  Apparently I know nothing about world events.  The "Famous World Leaders" section is blank because, aside from Obama, I don't know of any.

4.  I just had to turn to Google to find a newspaper clipping from his birthday.  Yes, he is 17 months old....don't judge.  Maybe the fact that we don't get the paper has something to do with my lack of knowledge regarding world leaders.

5.  I keep forgetting to record as each of his teeth come in.  I also may have confused the right side of his mouth with his left.  All dates on this page are now an estimate.

6.  Around the 1 year mark, it starts to ask you about your child's "favorites."  This is where real feelings of failure occur.
- "My favorite colors were" WTH???? 1 year olds are supposed to have favorite colors???  He is delayed because he doesn't have a preferred color?  So, what did I do.....I made it up. "Blue, red and green"  Those are strong colors right?
- "My best friends that were always by my side" 1 year olds have best friends?  If we are going by this description, then mommy is your best friend because she is the only one always by your side.  Did I neglect my child by not having his best friend over all day everyday?  Apparently they aren't supposed to leave each other's side.  More emotional scaring.
- "My favorite TV friends were" Is it bad that this list is Elmo, Mickey, and Andy Cohen from Watch What Happens Live on Bravo?  Is it worse that Andy was truly his favorite and the only one he consistently watched?  Moving on.....

7.  My other issue is that for his entire first year they have a page for every month.  They asked: sleeping patterns, eating habits, new foods I liked, new discoveries I made, my accomplishments, places I went, special friends I made, I learned some baby babbles this month.
Sometimes there were months where there was nothing new in a particular category and I felt the pressure to make something up because it would be bad to write "see 5th Month".  Also, 'My Accomplishments'?  Is he supposed to be earning awards and medals at 3 months?  Should he already be setting goals?  The 'places I went' category made me feel like we don't travel enough.  We set the bar too high by taking him to Europe in month 3.  'Special friends' was also let down when I was repeatedly naming the same kids just in a different order.  Maybe, if we traveled more, he would have more friends.

I am so glad I am working so hard on his baby book, although I'm sure he will never open it a single time since he is a boy and they don't care about these things.  Maybe I should really start exaggerating so I can show it to his future wife and she will be so impressed she will treat him like the prince he is.

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